The List: A Love Story In 781 Chapters

The blind date with a gluten allergy. The ex who can't stop talking about the French girlfriend who dumped him. The cute young bartender who knows how to make a Manhattan straight up. And, of course, Mr. Right-- who looks like Liam Neeson, writes poetry like e.e. cummings, plays the guitar like Jimmy Page. Until he turns out to be a complete and total jerk.
Narrated in 781 chapters-- "The List" is an irresistible look at love, dating, friendship, sex, cats, thongs, and shopping. And a story that's as pleasurable, as interesting, as gossipy, as truthful, as reassuring, as compelling, as sane, as necessary as a late-night phone call to your best friend ever. Pour a cup of tea, curl up on the couch, and read to your heart's content.

You will pick up this book because it has such a delightful, charming cover.
But more likely your best friend will give it to you.
a. Because you're looking for Mr. Right,
b. or you found Mr. Right,
c. or you just lost Mr. Right, who wasn't Mr. Right anyway,
d. or it's your birthday.
e. And you own a cat.
You'll wonder why every sentence is numbered.
You'll say to yourself, who is this person?
Then you'll decide, I like this person.
You'll laugh, thinking this person is sort of like you.
Not that you would ever dial your ex after too many drinks.
a. At least not on a work night.
You'll reminisce about watching "An Affair to Remember" while eating Ha agen-Dazs.
a. Out of the container.
You'll grin at that part about buying a thong. You'll want to shake the narrator to stop her from blurting out " I love you "
You'll study the photograph of the author again.
a. Is she really a waitress?
b. Did she ever rifle through her boyfriend's closet?
c. Is she also worried about cellulite?
You'll let the machine pick up because you have to finish the story.
You'll be on Chapter 718 and fighting the urge not to skip ahead.
You won't skip ahead.
You'll finish and say, Wow.
You'll call your girlfriend to thank her.
She'll suggest you meet for drinks.
There will be a man at the bar. He will
a. look like Liam Neeson,
b. have a bit of cat hair on his sweater,
c. be drinking your favorite cocktail.
He'll smile at you.
You' llsmile back, thinking, Chapter 1. . . .